Cowboy Sam was what you would call, a crummy cowboy at best. Our story begins with Sam wandering a dusty deserted road. He shields his eyes from the sun and looks around but Clarice, his horse, was nowhere to be found. He continued on his merry way until he heard ‘munch, munch, munch.’ He spun around wildly, wriggling his mustache as he went. There, on the horizon was his beloved horse, eating from a small lone patch of grass.
“Clarice!” He called before wrangling his horse. They had places to be, didn’t she understand! Cowboy Sam held onto his horse’s leash and they continued on, until they came to a small town.
Cowboy Sam was pulling Clarice through the town but there seemed to be a fuss near the bank. He decided to investigate. “What is everyone in a tizzy for?” He asked with his cowboy hands on his cowboy hips.
“It’s Bad Man Joe! He’s gonna kill us all!” A crazed towns citizen shouted.
“Shad-up!” A man yelled slapping him.
Cowboy Sam assumed this must be the Bad Man Joe. “Mr. Bad Man Sir, you should really leave these folks’ alone! You sure scared ‘em good!” Cowboy Sam explained. Bad Man Joe narrowed his eyes ready for a fight but Cowboy Sam was already on his way back down the street.
Cowboy Sam brought Clarice toward the saloon, where he’d request a hearty glass of milk. What our poor hero didn’t know however, was this saloon did NOT allow horses inside. But Cowboy Sam, ever the crummy Cowboy, marched right up to the bar and Barkeep with Clarice.
The Barkeep’s mouth hung open at the sight of the horse. “Can’t you read! No Horses in the bar!” The Barkeep shouted.
“Uh… Sir… This is a dog.” The Barkeep stared at Clarice skeptically rubbing his chin before shrugging.
“Alrighty, Cowboy. What’ll it be?”
“One milk, please.” Cowboy Sam replied with a lopsided smile. The Barkeep brought the milk and went back to work.
Just as Cowboy Sam was finishing his first milk, Bad Man Joe burst in! The Barkeep turned to Cowboy Sam betrayed and glared accusingly. “You brought Bad Man Joe here?! You traitor! I served you MILK!” He cried.
Cowboy Sam raised an eyebrow, “Me? I only met this fine fella a few-“ “Fine Fella?” The Barkeep got in Cowboy Sam’s face. “Anyone who considers Bad Man Joe a FINE FELLA is not welcome in my saloon!” The Barkeep whispered harshly.
Bad Man Joe walked over to Cowboy Sam. “You. Cowboy.” Cowboy Sam turned around with a frown.
“Now you just get on outta here Mr. Bad Man Sir. I’m just tryna have me a fine glass of milk.” And that is when it all went downhill.
Bad Man Joe punched Cowboy Sam square in his cowboy face and they began to tussle! Cowboy Sam roundhouse kicked Bad Man Joe and he flew across the bar leaving a Bad Man Joe shaped hole in the wall. The Barkeep was furious! “You will pay for that you lazy good for nothing Cowboy!” The Barman howelled.
“It’s Cowboy Sam, man!” Sam called running around a table from bad Man Joe.
Bad man Joe turned his attention from Cowboy Sam.“You! Barkeep! Why is there a horse in this bar? I had you put that sign in place for a reason!” Bad Man shouted running after Cowboy Sam.
The Barkeep gulped audibly. “But that’s a dog, Mr. Bad Man Joe!”
Bad Man Joe rolled his eyes and pulled Cowboy Sam up by his collar. “You listen here, you COWBOY.” Bad Man Sneered.
Now remember the part were we proclaimed Cowboy Sam was a crummy Cowboy? Well, Cowboy Sam let out a very un-cowboy like yelp, causing Clarice to rear up on her hind legs and knock out Bad Man Joe cold.
The saloon was silent. Then suddenly, “HURRAY!” Cheers all around from every patron- aside form the Barkeep.
The Barkeep ordered some of the townspeople to tie Bad Man Joe up and haul him off to jail. “You may have taken care of our Joe problem, but what about that HOLE IN MY WALL?”
Cowboy Sam motioned his head toward the door and grabbed his horse. “I’m sure Jail Man Joe has quite the pretty penny on his person… Come on Clarice. It’s our time to go.”
“But where will you go, Cowboy?” Asked the patron from before thoughtfully.
Cowboy Sam adjusted his hat, “Wherever the wind shall take me. Giddy-up Clarice.” Cowboy Sam tightened his hold on the leash as Clarice reared on her hind legs. The horse dragged Cowboy Sam along on the ground as they sped off into the distance- onto their next adventure.